to drop or not to drop?

to drop or not to drop?
that is the question.
whether tis nobler in mind to suffer
the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune
or to take arms against a sea of troubles
and by opposing, end them…

yep, i think those shakespearean verses from hamlet are applicable to this civpro brouhaha. imagine this. i’ve been studying really hard for this 5-unit subject in particular, much to the detriment of my other subjects even. don’t get me wrong, not that i resent the subject or find it boring at the least. call me nerdy, geeky and all but i do like that subject. question is, does it like me back? or better yet, does the prof like me back? (yeah, yeah, tibo raw sya but will my charms actually work on her?).

waaaah…i’m getting burned out na (puro kasi midterms! kasabay pa ang campaign period). and i’m starting to ask myself, is this truly worth all the stress? (kasi, kasalanan ko rin naman, nag-overload pa ako this sem, with a 2-unit elective on intellectual property law…so 19 units ako ngayon). i feel that i put in too much effort tapos, low ROI (return on investment) naman…huhuhu… 😦

so what if i do drop civpro? what are the cons?
1. i won’t get to finish law school in 4 years anymore (hurt pride. i’m not as smart as i/people thought i was pala…but kebs ba nila di ba? eh sa mahirap talaga eh. at oo na sige, i’m no legal genius. i’m just your everyday average UP law student)
2. or if i do decide that i wanna finish it in 4 years still, i’d be subjecting myself to too much stress in the coming sems (and summers too) by overloading (and i repeat, i don’t want this much mental stress…waaaah!!!)
3. what if i have a fighting chance naman pala of passing? sayang naman di ba kung di ko pa i-“sugal”? what am i so afraid of? i had an okay recit…although my midterms wasn’t really that spectacular. they say she doesn’t really check the midterms, and that she’s a finalist (pero moreso nga ako dapat matakot, di ba?)
4. i’ve never really dropped a core subject before (although, way back in undergrad, i do remember dropping my camping PE and this stupid english elective which i had no idea why i took). in other words, medyo hurt ang ego ko. (but to hell with ego, right? when survival is more important)
5. mas matatagalan pa before i tie the knot (but who says the timing for this is dependent on my graduation?)
6. if i drop it this sem, next year when i take it, it will still be under her anyways (no prob, she’s a good teacher, and i learn a lot from her. although, i’m not sure if the learning will actually reflect on the grades)

and what naman are the pro’s?
1. if i get delayed, so what if i spend one more year in malcolm hall? what’s so bad about it if…
a. i could review for the bar twice?
b. i could sit in sa consti 1 classes?
c. i could try out for the moot court?
d. i could run for other positions? (e.g. suggestment ni gilbert, student regent raw…yeah right! parang kumuha ako ng batong pinukpok sa ulo ko!)
2. less stress! i could enjoy law school more! (yeah right, like it’s enjoyable…but in fairness, learning about the law in the right doses is indeed enjoyable…yeah, yeah, i’m such a nerd)
3. again, who says the timing for my tying the knot is dependent on graduation? subject to the wishes of the future groom, i could get married on the last sem of law school anyways.
4. next time i take it again, mas alam ko na ang approach. i’d be able to understand and imbibe it better too. (at para mas maganda, sasabayan ko pa rin sila at makiki-aral pa rin ako…with less stress na this time. i think that’s the point.)
5. i’d have more time to study for my other subjects.
6. i could pay attention to my part-time job.
7. i could enjoy life more – a.k.a. makita ko naman ang pamilya ko nang mas madalas, enjoy more quality time with mike, time for extra-curricular & other rackets & hobbies (para naman di masyadong umiikot sa law school ang mundo ko, di ba?)

haaay, still the query exists. to drop or not to drop? yes, i think that’s the question that will linger in my mind till feb 20 – this sem’s deadline for dropping. mga friends, pls help pray for me, that i may be able to make the right decision.


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