1. i’ve been having a dilema about law school. the need to find more substantial means of livelihood and studying burn-out which translated to lack-luster recits and a depressing banking midterms (na madali lang naman, i studied naman, kaso it was just me) seemed to be a poweful combination to make me once more wonder whether or not i made the right choice to pursue this path four years ago. again, i feel so mediocre and left behind by peers. definitely, i need to go back to the vision which inspired me to choose this path four years ago, because right now, i’m really struggling with whether or not i still want to be a lawyer. if not, well i guess there’s no sense in staying…and may have just wasted 4 years of my life, and sacrificed a career for nought. (a huge part of me doesn’t want the 4 years to be for nought! and besides, if i turn back now, wouldn’t it be too late? okay pa kaya ang market value ko? malaki na rin ang na-invest ko dito)
well, at least now, i know that…
…i don’t want to be an account manager for the rest of my life
…i don’t want to be a politician in the future (gusto ko ng tahimi na buhay para sa pamilya ko)
…i don’t want to be a litigator (still not conclusive. i guess i’ll know for sure after OLA)
…i still want to serve the country – perhaps by being a technocrat or consultant to the government
…the legal profession is not the end-all and be-all (heck, most accountants who pursued the profession are more successful)
so i guess, whatever the choice will be at the end of the day, it will not totally be for nought.
btw, special thanks pala go to tiffy, cams, izzy, benj, ever, ms vita and greg, who listened to my rantings last saturday. and to my similarly-situated friend, rosanne, let us persevere.
2. mike & i went to UPLB last weekend. twas nice to see my mom once again and to attend the church service in CAP. i introduced mike formally as my husband and sang a song in the worship service’s offertory portion (had to sing accapella coz due to some technical difficulties as regards my accompaniment). it was nice to be back, and to be in a different environment. my mom treated mike and me to lunch at Bonito’s – my fave restau in LB. it was nice talking to my mom as well. i’m glad she understands my predicament. sabi nya, baka burn out lang daw ‘to coz i was really swamped in all aspects nung november and december. she even suggested LOA – rather than stopping permanently all together. kung may 1 sem LOA lang, i guess i’d go forit. but ayoko nang pahabain ‘to.
actually, last monday morning, when i was getting ready to go to school, super gulo ng utak ko about my dilemma. while i was praying, bigla ko na lang nasabi: kelangan, tapusin na ito. (ito, of course, pertains to law school). i guess that’s the realization with regard to all these. somehow, after realizing that, i felt better and a little bit more at peace.
3. last monday, an HR outsourcing company called me up for a job interview for project analyst. and so i went to makati yesterday in a corporate attire na matagal-tagal ko na ring di nasusuot. my ever-supportive husband woke me up, heated the water for my bath and sent me off to the subdivision gate. upon reaching makati, i decided not to ride a cab and to just ride an aircon jeep. it was my first time to do so – at P12, twas cheaper and more comfy than an FX.
anyway, shortly thereafter, i got to the office of the HR company. after i finished filling up some forms, the interview started. it was going pretty well when the interviewer finally said, “the project analyst position is going to be several notches lower than your previous ones. the salary is not going to be commensurate to what you want and to your skills. are you sure you’d want this position?”
guess what i replied.
di na ako mambibitin so i’ll go ahead with the story na lang. i replied, “actually…no.” we both laughed. “but i decided to go to this interview because i know that your company is an HR outsourcing company, i thought perhaps, you would be able to recommend me for other opportunities that would be well suited for my capabilities, my desired compensation and my situation as a law student.”
buti naman, the interviewer said, “yes, we will get in touch with you in the future. for sure, we’ll know of opportunities that are more well-suited for you. it’s just that ngayon, yung project analyst position yung urgent. actually, thank you nga for being honest, kaysa naman we’ll recommend you for the position tapos you’ll decline din naman, kami rin yung mapapahiya.”
after some pleasantries, we bid each other goodbye. i guess that went well.
5. after the interview, i decided to drop by the office of with lei g. lei g or leilani guillen is one of my bestfriends since elementary. magaling yung taong yon. elem validictorian namin, also graduated with honors in highschool and college (econ cum laude). she’s also a fabulous singer. anyway, we had breakfast and had a nice time catching up. i opened up my law school dilemma with her. she said she took a look at my CV and thought na even with the four-year hiatus from the corporate world, okay pa rin daw naman ang market value ko. (sana nga!) nakakatuwa rin at nakahanap rin ako ng kapwa interesado mag-try lang mag-audition sa pinoy idol. hahaha. last chance na namin, 28 na kami eh. (i bet she’ll get in and go far, magaling yon eh. as for me, mag-tr-try lang ako, just for the experience)
6. i rode a PUB from makati to QC yday (haven’t done so in ages!) upon arriving in QC, i decided to attend to my landlady duties. may bago na kaming boarder sa first floor apartment. afterwards, i got myself a new ‘do yesterday (new haircut and slightly different hair color – though you probably won’t notice the change that much because it’s not really different from the previous one. just a shade lighter). somehow, when i looked at myself at the mirror, sporting the new ‘do and all, sumaya ako. vain. hahaha.
7. wala kaming PRIL today. thank God! i could rest at home, just study nego all day long (at magsingit din ng tax) and write those testimonials for the LSG candidates. oooh, i’m excited for the election. i’m excited to turn over the role. 🙂 it was certainly fun and fulfilling while it lasted. but it has to end some time. hahaha.