But none of these things move me; nor do I count my life dear to myself, so that I may finish my race with joy, and the ministry which I received from the Lord Jesus, to testify to the gospel of the grace of God.
– Acts 20:24 NKJV
(Youversion’s Verse for the Day)
There are times when I get frustrated with the turn-out or pace of certain aspects of my life. I realized this morning that I feel such frustration because I tend to hold on too tightly to a certain expectation that I have for my life or one or a few of its aspects. In such light, we can say that I still count my life, or a certain image of it, as dear, perhaps too dear, to myself. In these moments, I need to remember how I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Jesus Christ now lives in me. When thus reminded, I am able to let go anew of the things that I hold too dearly, as I learn new levels of trust in the good and faithful God who only has plans to prosper me and give me hope and a future.
This morning I woke feeling lackadaisical. I just wanted to sleep all day. I was not excited because I felt I had nothing to look exciting forward to. After almost 2 weeks of bed rest, this feeling is no longer new to me. I asked the Lord where all that was coming from. I also asked how come some things in my life (and in the wold) do not line up with His words, which I know to be true. This dissonance caused frustration, and frustration also caused by holding on too tightly to a certain desired outcome. I realized that I tend to hold on too tightly, perhaps because of worry or fear of my inability to fulfill my calling (both vocation and aspirations for motherhood), lack, failure, and being left behind (or missing out). Hence I still tend to be moved when my aspirations and comfort zone get shaken.
I thought before that I’ve already surrendered and resurrendered my life to the Lord. I also learned that surrender is a moment-by-moment thing. Yet perhaps, there are thing as that we, unwittingly, hold on too tightly to, such that only shakings open our eyes of the need for further progressive surrender and new levels of letting go. Thankfully, the Lord has infinite capacity to catch us and our burdens until we reach full surrender and rest in His person. Complete rest in His finished work means that full and continual abiding in Jesus. Only by so doing are we able to proceed from place of righteousness, peace and joy – His Kingdom nonetheless, and thus help usher in His will on earth, as it is in Heaven, as we finish our race with joy and testify to the good news of God’s amazing grace.
On a related note, the following words got me to ponder more on whether or not I count my life as too dear, to the point of being moved, as well as on how I begin each day:
God is not trying to get us looking deeper and deeper into why things have or haven’t happened the way we wanted or expected. He keeps prompting us to look at Jesus as the answer. Everything else is sinking sand.
How do you feel about yourself? If it’s anything other than really happy, you’re building at least a little bit of your life on the wrong foundation. God wants to give you overflowing joy and peace that passes understanding. If you wake in the morning and try to gauge how you are by your feelings, that’s a symptom of building on shifting sand. Wake up instead and declare, “This is the day that the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it!” God doesn’t want us to waste our time with sand at all. If we’re really going to walk in the miraculous, knowing our foundation is crucial. We have to build on the rock, insisting on the truth: “I’m a new creation in Christ. Old things have passed away.
If you have any circumstances in your life that are trying to weigh you down and make you look at them instead of at Jesus, be like the psalmist and refuse to give yourself to those things. Don’t concern yourself with matters you weren’t designed to figure out; instead, calm and quiet your soul like a weaned child, and HOPE IN THE LORD ALONE. Go straight to God and let Him wrap His arms around you. In His light you’ll see light. Jesus is the answer to everything you’re going through and the key to living in miraculous power.
He’s the one who says, “This is My will in every situation. I can work everything together for good. I can cause My power to flow through you to heal and deliver. Just trust Me, even when you don’t feel like you can, and recognize that I am for you. I am not against you, and I’m not holding back. My power, My peace, and My love are available to any who will keep pressing in and believing in Me as the only foundation of their faith. If you will bring Me your questions, I will show you that I am the answer. I will glorify Myself in you because that is My nature. It’s who I am.”
Keep pursuing Him for the miraculous. Don’t give up, and don’t settle for false explanations of why things aren’t happening yet. Measure everything by the standard of Jesus—His nature, His character, His ministry, and His words. He’s the same yesterday, today, and forever. – From:
Therefore I conclude: for nothing to move you, learn how to let go DAILY