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Trust God, not yourself

A girl friend shared with me last night their next lesson in their Victory Discipleship Group, an excerpt of which I post below:

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And the ultimate answer to the question posed above:

God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through? – Numbers 23:19 NLT

In another version:

God is not a man, that He should tell or act a lie, neither the son of man, that He should feel repentance or compunction [for what He has promised]. Has He said and shall He not do it? Or has He spoken and shall He not make it good? – Numbers 23:19 AMP

Having this in mind, I continue to claim God’s promises for my marriage:

And the two shall become one flesh, so that they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has united (joined together), let not man separate or divide. – Mark 10:8‭-‬9 AMP

Clear as day, especially here:

Jesus said, “Moses wrote this command only as a concession to your hardhearted ways. In the original creation, God made male and female to be together. Because of this, a man leaves father and mother, and in marriage he becomes one flesh with a woman—no longer two individuals, but forming a new unity. Because God created this organic union of the two sexes, no one should desecrate his art by cutting them apart.” – Mark 10:5‭-‬9 MSG

If God decrees this in my marriage, He will bring it to pass because…

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Today, I woke up early in the morning and felt prompted to go into intercessory warfare prayer mode. I strongly felt that there was some form of darkness wanting to close in, even giving me suicidal thoughts. It made me want to give up on my marriage, confusingly after I surrendered a particular decision in prayer (was convicted and I’ve decided that I will not be hiring a private investigator; instead, I will be still).

BUT GOD. And so, after awhile, I felt God’s peace diffuse the dark presence. As I prayed, God revealed to me that: The best way to counter the pride in my husband’s heart is meekness and humility (so not easy for a lawyer, believe me! But before I am a lawyer, I am the daughter of the King, and I ask for His grace to do this). To melt his anger, bitterness, and resentment, I am to overflow with more of God’s love and forgiveness. To counter condemnation and shame, I need to be more gracious and stop recalling the wrongs (and it all starts with a renewed mind in the Lord, and a healed heart…whatever the rejection hurled at me, may it just slide for I am accepted and loved in the Beloved). May God cause my husband to see Jesus in me, to lead to a direct encounter between them. I shall cease to pursue him, and get back to my true focus: pursuing God. Hence, the One Thing Conference that I’ll be attending next week. I gotta get back to my first love.

As for my husband, if he is a mouse that will play when the proverbial cat is away (when I’ll be in Cebu), I leave him in God’s hands. Only God has control over everything. Only He can change the hardest of hearts. My husband is a lost sheep that God will bring back to the flock, which I belong to…and when he’s back, there He’ll find me…i just trust God on this. I know I will receive my miracle because the Living God sees me and is on my side.

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I went to bed and fell asleep again afterwards. The Lord allowed me to wake up ahead of my husband (something unusual). I cooked breakfast for him. As I was trying to thaw the bacon with hot water, the Holy Spirit impressed to me that He is thawing my husband’s heart. God is fire (i.e. burning bush), and He is thawing Mike’s heart through the waters of His Holy Spirit. He is answering my prayer for Him to pour out His Spirit on my husband.

Before, during and after breakfast, I noticed my husband’s heart to start thawing. He thanked me for breakfast and got interested in my story about last night’s night out, when unknown to him, he walked into the same bar that my friend and I were at. When I showed him this meme, he thanked me:

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My friend messaged me about how she had a better feeling about my husband and me when she awoke this morning:

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And indeed:

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The past few days may have been very rough. But I believe change is coming…only God had to change my heart first – to trust God alone and not rely on my supposed strengths (decisiveness, quick thinking and supposedly diplomatic speech – but deadly when combined with a being pikon), to be a more domesticated wife, to learn how to respect and love my husband unconditionally especially in the difficult times.

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Lord, thank You for these developments. I continue to submit myself, my husband and our marriage to You. You got all these in Your hands, I know. I just thank You, for I know that in my distress, You hear my cry. And You break every chain, for You set the captives free and heal the brokenhearted. Heal our broken hearts, Lord. I submit the rest of this day to You, while I just hide in You. And I claim these words in my situation, O Lord. Thank You, for I know You are at work. In Jesus’ name, amen.

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