Yesterday, in our Revival Group, the topic of spiritual gifts was discussed. Towards the end, as Ella prayed for me, she released a word that greatly impacted me: NO MORE RELUCTANCE.
It made me ponder on how there seemed to have been a pattern of reluctance in my life. At several points, I was reluctant to continue my courses and take the related licensure exams, reluctant with a number of relationships in my life, reluctant with my profession and my jobs, with being in the worship ministry, with leadership. In my relationship with God, reluctance in my walk with God that has caused me to back slide in the past and fluctuate in my pursuit of Him.
Now, as I am on the cusp of a new season, where the Lord is birthing new things in me, both in the spirit and in the natural, God has seen my initial reluctance and wanted to put a stop to it once and for all. He is simply saying: NO MORE RELUCTANCE. Out of His grace, the Lord revealed this so I can receive from Him the power to do the good works He has prepared in advance for me to do.
From this revelation, the Lord also made me realize these:
Borne out of double-mindedness and trauma, reluctance causes awkwardness, indecisiveness or half-heartedness in pursuits. The half-heartedness ends up frustrating one who knows in his heart that he can do better if only he gave a pursuit his all. The reluctance prevents him from stewarding his gifts and his call well. From reluctance springs timidity and lack of authenticity (as there are times when a reluctant person still undertakes a task, faking it till he makes it). These feed double-mindedness all the more.
But guess what. God hates double-mindedness. It is disloyalty to God. No wonder double-mindedness and reluctance causes one to feel lost. It produces instability. But God by His grace wants to find the lost and steady the unstable. Thank You, Lord!
Yes, caution should be exercised as the Lord leads, but reluctance is not to be confused with prudence. It is incompatible with faith, passion and a pioneering spirit. Reluctance is primarily rooted in fear. Then again, God has not given us a spirit of fear or timidity, but a spirit of power and of a sound mind.
In my heart of hearts, the Lord knows that I want to co-labor with Him. I thank Him for exposing and taking away all traces of reluctance, just like what He did in Moses, Jonah and Peter. Thank You, Lord!
Nathaniel, the 4th disciple, was also one in whom Jesus saw initial reluctance after he heard about Jesus from Philip. Seeing Nathaniel’s reluctance, Jesus gave a word, which arrested Nathaniel’s reluctance: He told him that He saw him under the fig tree, a place where he must have felt so hidden…and that was even before he decided to follow Jesus.
Not only did Jesus give Nathaniel the assurance of being seen, but He also gave him a word on seeing an open heaven with angels ascending (from the earth) and descending upon Him. (I believe this word opened Nathaniel’s spiritual vision. I have also longed for that for some time now until I got tired of longing for it. It is a desire that God has birthed in me again, and through His word to Nathaniel, He is giving me a similar word. Yes, Lord, let me see that I may testify about it…about You.)
Indeed, only the Lord can truly address the issue of a reluctant heart. A word from Him can settle the matter once and for all.
After receiving that word, I wanted to learn more about battling reluctance. I realized though that there are so few Christian articles on reluctance. Could it be because reluctance is so subtle and even the best of us experience it at times? Yet addressing it is so important, as it is something that hinders the body of Christ from being totally sold out for the Lord and His purposes.
Google helped me find this article, one of the few materials out there, which puts it so aptly:
God can use what you offer to Him, but He cannot use what you withhold.
Through this article, I realized, as well, that double-mindedness prevents one from being used by the Lord. It deters one from prompt obedience, and whole-hearted obedience at that.
With reluctance exposed through the light of Christ, it simply has to flee.
All systems go now. No more reluctance, hesitation or double-mindedness. Eyes fixed on Him and the vision. Charging onward anew.
Jesus, thank You for searching and knowing my heart and exposing the pattern of reluctance in my life. Because You are my Lord and I am led by Your Spirit, I am no longer swayed by the spirit of reluctance. Your perfect love casts out, drives out all fear which feeds the reluctance. Your fire and dunamis power heals traumas behind the reluctance, such that I declare that I am excellent of soul in You. In Your name and by the power of Your love, Jesus, I realign and resubmit myself to You cutting any and all ties with reluctance in You, Your Word and Your Ways. Forgive me for the double-mindedness. Forgive me for disloyalty and delayed obedience to You as well as lack of faith and trust in You. Forgive me for the timea when I did not put my heart into what you’ve called me to do. Cleanse me with Your blood. Burn away any chaff left, Lord. Seal me, o Lord, for You and Your purposes alone. With reluctance gone, help me to steward Your call and gifts, according to Your Word and ways. I ask for more of Your grace upon grace regarding this. I badly need it. Thank You, Jesus, for making me stable, steady in You, as You root me even deeper in Your love. By the power of Your blood, the Cross and Your Resurrection. Amen.